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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29795709">Dean's Secret</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BumbleBeeBat22/pseuds/BumbleBeeBat22'>BumbleBeeBat22</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>BiDean, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Implied Past Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, accidental forced coming out, ally Bobby Singer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 16:55:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,166</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29795709</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BumbleBeeBat22/pseuds/BumbleBeeBat22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean finally feels comfortable enough to get a pride pin and thinks he's alone enough to take it out and admire it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Dean's Secret</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dean held the small pin in his hands. Such a little thing carried so much weight. Even having it out for this long made his heart pound. He couldn’t take his eyes off the wavy colors. If his father even just saw him holding it… Dean didn’t want to think about that punishment. But his father wasn’t here.</p><p>The pin had been stashed away at the very bottom of his bag for weeks before he finally had the courage to take it out. Dean would be able to hear Bobby coming back into the house and hear Sam coming out of the shower. The moment Dean knew he was safely alone he wanted to admire the pin and feel like himself without too much shame. If felt very wrong, but Dean knew deep down that this was who he was.</p><p>The bi pride flag pin glistened in the sun from the window. He couldn’t stop the smile from appearing on his face. All those years of his father pounding it out of him, he was actually able to bring himself to even hold the flag. It was a start.</p><p>“What you got in your hand?” Bobby’s voice felt like a gunshot through his stomach. He quickly closed his hand around the small pin. His heart started racing as he turned to face Bobby.</p><p>“Nothing,” Dean said quickly. Bobby didn’t take the lie, “Porn. On my phone,”</p><p>“How small is your phone?” Bobby’s eyes fell on the desk where Dean’s phone lay face down, “Uh huh,” suspicion clung to his voice.</p><p>Not Bobby. Not Bobby. Anyone but Bobby. Please not Bobby. Dean’s thoughts were racing. How was he going to get out of this one.</p><p>“Let me see,” Bobby held out his hand. Dean took a small step back and pulled his hand closer to his chest. At this point Dean knew Bobby could see the fear in him, “Dean?”</p><p>Dean didn’t even try to hide his fear anymore but he would still do anything to hide his secret, “It’s nothing,” he said again, trying to sound more convincing but failing exceedingly.</p><p>“Even if I didn’t lie for a living I’d be able to see right through you,” Bobby shifted like he was going to move towards Dean and Dean jumped back a few steps. His fear had become so rampant he was breathing hard. Bobby’s expression turned from confusion to concern, “Dean,” he said softer, “What is it?”</p><p>Dean couldn’t look Bobby in the eye anymore, “I said it’s nothing. Leave it alone,”</p><p>“Boy, you better show me what’s in your hand,” Bobby raised his voice slightly, enough for Dean’s insides to squirm even more.</p><p>Dean knew he was defeated. There was no way Bobby was going to let this one go. He couldn’t run away and find something else to take its place. He had backed himself into a corner. Dean looked away from Bobby and reached his hand out, clutching the pin tightly in his grasp. The closer Bobby got the more panic rose inside him. What would Bobby do? Yell at him? Scream at him to leave? Never let him come back? Disown him? Bobby was one of the few people Dean had, he couldn’t lose him. But Dean knew he had probably already lost him the moment he stole the pin in the first place.</p><p>Bobby reached out his hand so it sat under Dean’s. Dean could feel his knuckles turning white and the pin digging into his palm.</p><p>“It’s ok, Dean,” the softness of Bobby’s voice surprised him enough to unhinge his hand enough for the pin to drop down to Bobby’s. It landed face down so Bobby still couldn’t see what it was.</p><p>Dean could feel tears starting to form but he pushed them back. Bobby looked down at the pin in confusion before finally flipping it over.</p><p>Dean didn’t know how long Bobby stared down at the pin but from what it felt like to Dean it was several years. His heart would be his sense of time but it was beating so fast he would lose count as soon as he started.</p><p>“I’m unfamiliar with the patterns on the flags. What is this?” Bobby looked back up to Dean. He couldn’t tell what expression was on his face.</p><p>Dean took a deep breathe and swallowed, “It’s bisexual,” he had never said the word out loud before. Saying it for the first time, in front of someone, by coming out to them felt like knives in his mouth. He knew it was wrong. He knew it was wrong. Everything in him was squirming.</p><p>“And that means...” Bobby left the sentence hanging like a question for Dean to finish like an answer.</p><p>“Liking both men and women,” The words felt like sandpaper.</p><p>“That goes for you?” it felt as if Bobby was gearing up for the shouting. Dean could feel it was like the calm before the storm. He was going to have to take it one way or the other so might as well take it strong.</p><p>Dean stood up straighter and cleared his throat. Dean didn’t feel like he was saying the words as they felt so foreign and forbidden as they fell off his tongue, “Yes, sir,”</p><p>“How many times do I have to tell you boys,” Bobby shook his head, “You don’t have to call me ‘sir’” Bobby tossed the pin back to Dean who almost didn’t realize what was happening and barely caught it in time. Dean stared at Bobby, “What?” Bobby asked at Dean’s bewildered face.</p><p>“I thought-”</p><p>“You thought what?” Bobby stared back at Dean, “I’d be homophobic?”</p><p>Dean stood still for a few more moments before shrugging. He felt some weight lift of his shoulders in hope but the knot stayed tight around his insides.</p><p>“I have read all the lore about hundreds of creatures I have ever been able to get my hands on dating back centuries that sometimes mingles with humans and regular animals and you still expect me to believe homosexuality is the only thing there is?” Dean stood speechless, the fear and panic from before was forgotten, “I’m sorry you had to come out to me like this, if I had actually known that is what you were hiding I never would have forced you to show it to me,”</p><p>Dean still didn’t say anything for a few more breaths, “Wait, so you’re not mad at me?”</p><p>“Why would I be mad?”</p><p>“Because…” Dean stumbled over his words, still unfamiliar with saying what he wanted to say out loud, “Because I’m gay,”</p><p>“That is no reason to be mad. You can’t help it,”</p><p>“So… you’re… ok with it?”</p><p>Bobby chuckled, “It’s going to take a lot more than you being gay for me to care less about you, ya idjit,” Dean couldn’t keep the smile from appearing on his own face.</p><p>“Thank you, Bobby,” Dean clutched the pin in his hands, the weight of it already feeling lighter.</p>
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